票享人生，文化活动，分享品质生活与快乐，酷乐亚洲 诚意推荐！
If everyone in the paintings has enormous asses, then it’s Rubens.
如果画里的每个人都有个大屁股，那奏是 鲁本斯。
If all the men look like cow-eyed curly-haired women, it’s Caravaggio.
画里是大眼睛又卷毛的娘炮，那就是 卡拉瓦乔。
If everybody has some sort of body malfunction, then it’s Picasso.
如果画里的人都有那么些残疾部位，那就是 毕加索。
If it’s something you saw on your acid trip last night, it’s Dali.
画就跟你昨晚嗑药High了之后看见的东西似的，那是 达利。
If the images have a dark background and everyone has tortured expressions on their faces,
it’s Titian.
画里背景都黑布隆冬的，脸上表情都跟受尽了折磨似的，必是 提香。
If the paintings have tons of little people in them but otherwise seem normal, it’s Bruegel.
如果画里全都是一坨一坨小人儿，除此之外其他还挺正常的话，是 勃鲁盖尔。
If the paintings have lots of little people in them but also have a ton of crazy bullshit, it’s
Bosch.
如果画里有一坨一坨小人儿，但还有一坨一坨操蛋东西的话，博斯。
If everyone – including the women – looks like Putin, then it’s van Eyck.
如果每个人都长着副死气沉沉普京脸，那是 凡艾克。
If each of the characters in the picture are like dark under the lights of the tramp, that is
Rembrandt
如果画里的每个人物都像昏暗街灯下的流浪汉，那是 伦勃朗。
If the painting could easily have a few chubby Cupids or sheep added (or already has them),
it’s Boucher.
如果画里动不动就一群圆滚滚丘比特或者山羊，那是 布歇。
If everyone is beautiful, naked, and stacked, it’s Michelangelo.
如果画作里有裸着的俊男美女并且人压人，那是 米开朗基罗。
If you see a ballerina, it’s Degas.
画芭蕾舞娘的是 德加。
If every painting is the face of a uni-browed woman, it’s Frida.
画中是个有连心眉的女人，那是 弗里达 画的。
If everything is highly-contrasted and sharp, sort of bluish, and everyone has gaunt bearded
faces，it’s ElGreco.
如果画里的每样东西都明暗对比强烈、边缘锐利，还总透着点蓝洼洼，人物又都胡子拉碴憔悴不堪得，
是 格列柯。
Dappled light but no figures, it’s Monet.
充满光斑，但没有人物 (轮廓？)，莫奈。
Dappled light and happy party-time people, it’s Renoir.
光斑，外加快快乐乐的Party，雷诺阿。
Dappled light and unhappy party-time people, then it’s Manet.
光斑，外加愁眉苦脸的Party，马奈。
Lord of the Rings landscapes with weird blue mist and the same wavy-haired aristocratic-nose
Madonna,it’s Da Vinci.
景色像《指环王》里一样壮阔，却笼罩着怪怪的蓝色迷雾；圣母玛利亚总有着同样的卷发与贵族式的鼻
子。这是 达芬奇。
酷荐上海，乐享生活！
